Big Nate by Lincoln Peirce for June 22, 2003
"Time once again for...Biff & Chip...on Safari!" "What are we tracking today, Biff?" "Chip, it's the common 6th grade social studies teacher!" "But...the school year is over!" "Exactly! We'll be observing her during her summer hibernation! Oop! THere she is!" "Does she actually hibernate, Biff?" "Not literally! But she does a lot of lying around!" "She needs to rest!" "Rest? Is she sick?" "If by 'sick' you mean 'sadistic and needlessly cruel,' then...Yes, chip! Yes, she is sick!" "She's just spent an entire school year bullying and persecuting her students! Making impossible demands! Punishment them indiscriminately!" "Say, that does sound tiring!" "It is mi amigo! Teachers burn a lot calories!" "That's why she needs to bulk up! To ensure that she's ready for another grueling year, she needs to add fat to her body! Lots of fat!" "Jumbo Banana split with double fudge!" "She's 'super-sizing'!"