FoxTrot Classics by Bill Amend for June 03, 2023

  1. Dragon
    Asharah  6 months ago

    Dump it on her head!

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    C  6 months ago

    Time to plot an appropriate gesture of appreciation for her

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    seanfear  6 months ago

    he needs a mistress

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    MeanBob Premium Member 6 months ago

    I predict a verdict of justifiable homicide.

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    Lyrak  6 months ago

    Be prepared for a massive headache from caffeine withdrawal, Roger.

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    einarbt  6 months ago

    Grounds for a divorce, right, well if her cooking isn’t enough grounds already. Do you need grounds in the US?

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    Imagine  6 months ago

    On this one I actually agree with Andy.

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    Jason Allen  6 months ago

    I find that nothing wakes you up quite like prescription amphetamines. Nothing keeps you awake long past your ideal bedtime quite like them either.

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    MayCauseBurns  6 months ago

    This must be why Starbucks exists.

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    Kwen  6 months ago

    “Refreshing” her by dumping said glass on her head is the kindest thing I’d think about in Roger’s place…

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    Purple People Eater  6 months ago

    Drinking a glass of apple juice will wake you up better than a cup of coffee.

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    GabryelFrost  6 months ago

    Now this is just plain evil !

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    HappyDog/ᵀʳʸ ᴮᵒᶻᵒ ⁴ ᵗʰᵉ ᶠᵘⁿ ᵒᶠ ᶦᵗ Premium Member 6 months ago

    Why can’t Roger operate a Keurig?

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    Fishenguy Premium Member 6 months ago

    Don’t mess with my coffee in the morning!

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    biglar  6 months ago

    I took up drinking coffee in college. I’ll be the first to admit I (like every other coffee drinker) am badly addicted to it.

    Believe it or not, I managed to quit once. It was about 10 years ago (I was in my early 40’s). I had been suffering from a 3 day stomach flu. When I got over the bug, I realized that I had gone 3 days without coffee, I might as well just stop drinking it. What followed can only be described as bizarre. I spent the next two months with the feeling that my consciousness was roughly 3 inches to the right of my physical self and I was operating my body via remote control. The world was just “off.”

    The thing that made quitting the hardest is that you don’t realize how many times a day you get offered a cup of coffee until you have to say “no” constantly. I suppose it depends on one’s social circles, but in small towns coffee is a big deal. It’s also a big deal if you work in maintenance in manufacturing. Having a cup of coffee in your hand while sitting in an old friend’s kitchen is important somehow. And watching the sun rise over Detroit from the top of a blast furnace seems to demand it (an experience from a previous job).

    I think I was nearly caffeine free for two years. (What I just recently found out in conversation with my (nearly) adult children is that I was miserable to be around for the first 6 months of that time.)

    My downfall was another illness. I was dealing with an extended head cold / sinus infection and the day came that I HAD to be awake and sharp. So I brewed up some two-year old grounds in a saucepan and filtered it through a coffee filter with a strainer. That afternoon I bought myself a brand new coffee pot and thus ended my caffeine-free days.

    Honestly, I like my coffee.

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    rs0204 Premium Member 6 months ago

    …And that’s when I killed her, your Honor.

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    Chris  6 months ago

    so he could splash it on himself… meh, it doesn’t always work.

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    Deezlebird  6 months ago

    Yeah, good job. If he makes it to work without killing himself, he’ll NEVER drink coffee there. Andi is such an unlikable character.

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    Ol' me  6 months ago

    I’m glad I never got into the coffee habit. My parents drank coffee all day long, as did my wife’s. Our (grown) kids drink coffee all day long. It skipped a generation with us.

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    More Coffee Please!  6 months ago

    Nobody’s taking my coffee away – nobody. I buy my own anyway. We all have a hill we’d die on, and this is mine.

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    Daltongang Premium Member 6 months ago

    Andy, you might want to consider that Roger has never once entertained the thought of divorcing you. Killing you YES, but never divorcing you.

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    Irish53  6 months ago

    P 4 (Roger): “… okey dokey andi… have it your way…” ( reaches for a bottle)

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    billwog  6 months ago

    There are sick people everywhere. Sick and cruel.

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    ladykat  6 months ago

    At least cut him back gradually so his body has time to detox. I only allow myself one cup a day, and sometimes I skip coffee altogether for a couple of days.

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    Camiyami Premium Member 6 months ago

    I’ve never had coffee, and I wake up just fine. :)

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    billdaviswords  6 months ago


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    mindjob  6 months ago

    If I wanted to quit drinking coffee, first I’d go to Italy where you can only get coffee in little cups, then I’d go someplace where they didn’t have it. It’s a two-step plan for coffeeholics

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    InuYugiHakusho  6 months ago

    Andy, this will come back to haunt you when Roger runs up a massive bill at Starbucks.

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    Drbarb71 Premium Member 6 months ago

    I came back from Italy, bought an espresso maker, and enjoy REAL coffee every morning. American mad coffee is just brown water.

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    Drbarb71 Premium Member 6 months ago

    American made-sorry. Starbucks is just sugared water. Same with Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf. Peets gets close to Italian Coffee but not quite, and Porto’s Cuban Coffee nails it.

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    Fennec! at the Disco  6 months ago

    Apparently Roger needs coffee to get his eyes to open.

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    bigheadx  6 months ago

    I want and need my hot bean juice!

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    T...  6 months ago

    Andy was a Masterdebator when under the caffeine habit…

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    asrialfeeple  6 months ago

    Dump the ice water on her, Roger

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    John Jorgensen  6 months ago

    She’s right.

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    Templo S.U.D.  6 months ago

    any other excuses why you coffee drinkers drink coffee?

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    Kwen  6 months ago

    Well… there is always Garfield last resort solution. .

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    The Pro from Dover  6 months ago

    This deserves an old urge to kill from they’ll do it every time

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