Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for July 05, 2018

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    BE THIS GUY  over 4 years ago

    Just don’t look at obituaries. Ignorance is bliss on this situation.

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    AtariDragon  over 4 years ago

    Not necessarily the majority, only the ones you really miss.

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    syzygy47  over 4 years ago

    Go make some “friends” on Facebook. (Myself, I only ‘friend’ people I actually know IRL)

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    wiatr  over 4 years ago

    Man, 2013 was a bad year for me. I had three friends pass that year. One of them was a regular computer correspondent. We popped messages back and forth all night when I was online. There sure was a hole that wasn’t filled for a few years.

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    Robin Harwood  over 4 years ago

    If I’ve heard of them, I assume they’re dead.

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    Radish the old word monger Premium Member over 4 years ago

    What a dreamer.

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    Liverlips McCracken Premium Member over 4 years ago

    That makes for a pretty good working definition.

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    blunebottle  over 4 years ago

    Thanks for the reminder, Rat.

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    Ned Dickens  over 4 years ago

    Sadly there are wayyyyyyyyyyyy more people who died in the past than the total amount of people still living in the present. We all have to make new friends while we still can!

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    the lost wizard  over 4 years ago

    Why does Pastis use the word “new”?

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    Ginger Retiree  over 4 years ago

    Yeah, and most of the celebrities I really really liked are dead now too …. ¯\(ツ)

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    Egrayjames  over 4 years ago

    I like the definition from a ‘Little Feat’ song……“You know that you’re over the hill when your mind makes a promise that your body can’t fill!”

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    enigmamz  over 4 years ago

    When technology you never understood is obsolete.

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    Stevefk  over 4 years ago

    My grandfather used to check the obituaries in the paper every day, said if he didn’t see his name listed it was going to be a good day!

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    PICTO  over 4 years ago

    At this stage in life they’re not called friends…they’re called pallbearers.

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    jessie d. Premium Member over 4 years ago

    nope, it’s when the the people worth knowing are all dead. This kinda explains Trump he’s a vampire who will never die.

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    chris_o42  over 4 years ago

    Oh damn…

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    F-Flash  over 4 years ago

    Stephen is playing the role of Pig today. Now we know why Pig is the way he is.

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    vics_machine Premium Member over 4 years ago

    I wish I was as old as I was the first time I thought I was old.

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    hariseldon59  over 4 years ago

    Considering that Stephan is only 50, it’s hard for me to believe that most of his friends have already died.

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    e.groves  over 4 years ago

    I knew I was getting older when I started wanting a Buick Roadmaster.

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    some idiot from R'lyeh Premium Member over 4 years ago

    I wanna do the math on how long it takes a kindergarten teacher to become old, but I couldn’t raise the effort to even work out the assumptions.

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    Ignatz Premium Member over 4 years ago

    When three of your friends have died in the last six months.

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    Willywise52 Premium Member over 4 years ago

    Good luck with that,Pastis.

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    YatInExile  over 4 years ago

    I knew I was old when I saw Valerie Bertinelli on the cover of AARP magazine.

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    StackableContainers  over 4 years ago

    You are old once you start saying you having lived too long.

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    cdnalor  over 4 years ago

    When your parents, aunts and uncles are gone, then you know you’ve got about 20 years left.

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    VICTOR PROULX  over 4 years ago

    “It is not true that people stop pursuing dreams because they grow old, they grow old because they stop pursuing dreams.” Gabriel García Márquez.

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    Radish the old word monger Premium Member over 4 years ago

    Another day older and deeper in debt…

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    knight1192a  over 4 years ago

    funny, I thought it was when you were no longer asked to show your driver’s license when buying alcohol.

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    robin.axten Premium Member over 4 years ago

    “old age ends and senescence begins,the day your descendants outnumber your friends” Odgen Nash

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    Lablubber   over 4 years ago

    “How do I know my youth is all spent? My get up and go has got up and went.” – Pete Seeger

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    WF11  over 4 years ago

    I just saw this addressed on-line: “If you want to know if you’re ‘old’, just fall down in front of a group of people. If they laugh, you’re still young. If they run over to help you, then you’re old!”.

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    Charlie Tuba  over 4 years ago

    Two of my friends from the dorms at college passed away within the last few years. Also someone I knew from Student Government passed away just before she won her re-election to the State Senate in 2010.

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    Charlie Tuba  over 4 years ago

    I made a big deal when I passed 49. Douglas Adams, my high school band director and a friend for school and church all passed away at 49. I also made a big deal when I outlived my paternal grandfather. He passed away about a month and a half before his 58th birthday.

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    Sisyphos  over 4 years ago

    No pity for Cartoon-Boy. He can draw himself a big bunch of new "friends"….

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    JudyAz  over 4 years ago

    I like Tom Lehrer’s line: “It is a sobering thought that when Mozart was my age, he had been dead for three years.”

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    SukieCrandall Premium Member over 4 years ago

    We have friends who are older and friends who are younger. Heck, I am 39 years older than one of my close friends. I find it invigorating to encounter new perspectives and they tend to appreciate mine, as well.

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    duplin  over 4 years ago

    When you get an AARP brochure in the mail and noticed it’s addressed to you….not occupant. I had just turned 50 at the time….

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    BOSFLASH  over 4 years ago

    I knew I was getting old when nobody seemed to be in my way anymore.

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