Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for October 10, 2019

You’re not the only one.

just like me

Or you could be one those people, who when pinned under a car are asked by a paramedic how you’re doing, answer, “I’m good, thanks.”

In Russia, people answer “How are you?” with “Normal.” (Makes more sense to me.)

When Goat asked How Are You?, he really wasn’t asking how you are.

Rat redeemed himself in the last frame.

F I N E = Fearful, Insecure, Neurotic, [and] Emotional!

I’m using “OhhhhKay” these days. More like the truth. I’m neither fine nor “F.I.N.(&)E.” though closer to the former than the latter.

I do not fear death but I don’t wish to die anytime soon.

Rat is such a joy to be around… not!

I used to say, “I’m okay so far but the day is young.”

Now I just say, “It’s too soon to tell,” because it’s shorter and I’m out of breath.

Rat stop taking those pills ! … Croc Power !

I’m not going to say “fine” when I’m not.

This strip sums up Rat in a nutshell.

I have used “Still kicking, but not so high”. I also like “Still pulling daisies rather than pushing them.” I don’t use it though because I never pulled a daisy in my life. Maybe I should start. Pull a daisy and chant, “Pull a daisy, pull a daisy not.”

I generally answer “could be worse”. I don’t mean it to be particularly humorous, but many seem to take it that way.

Somehow my internal thoughts make into today’s strip, DING!

I’m applying for disability and I went to the doctor’s office the other day for an examination. The doctor asked me “How’s your health”. I answered “Except for all the things that are wrong with me, I’m doing fine”.

“not bad” is a common answer in my work-world. I understand it to mean “put me out of my misery before I have to endure another day in this hellhole”. Rat would empathise.

Me too! Smart rat and and smart cartoonist!

I usually say something like “Magnificent.” It’s almost as off-putting as answering with a complaint.

I use “nearly perfect”.

I usually say that “I’m blessed. How are you?” Most people answer, “I am too.”

What do you mean Rat – you’re not running the world.

Maybe Rat needs a support group: https://emotionsanonymous.org/

When people at work asked me how I was, my usual response was “I wish I were dead!”. Their reply was generally something like “Oh, that’s nice.” Nobody listens…

Rat speaks for all of us.

“I’m not unwell, thank you.” (and thank you, Mr. Carlin)

so basically rat is an emo. Oh the pain, I have everything and I am in no need but I still carry the weight of the world in my back, despite that the only thing I do is being a cynic, criticize everything, feel entitled and that the world owns me even if I have done nothing yet

Join the club, Rat!

Still this side of the dirt.

That is one deadpan vermin.

I’m with Rat, but I never tell anyone.

“Do you want the short dishonest answer, or the long honest one?”

Rat just needs a different definition of F.I.N.E.(Fans of Louise Penny know what I mean) http://www.louisepenny.com/faqs.htm

Vote the bums out, in 2020.Spineless Moscow Mitch,and dumb ass Donnie have done too much damage ;(

My better half is fond of saying, “When someone asks you how you are, it’s not a real question, so they aren’t interested in the real answer.”

Remember, “How are you” is a greeting, not a question.

Come on, Rat … don’t be unfair. Dumpface Orange doesn’t run EVERYTHING.

This is why I never greeted my granny with “How are you?” She would spend 15 minutes telling me about all her aches and pains and wondering whether she had the Reader’s Digest malady of the month. Instead, I began asking “What have you been doing recently?”

I have always found the “how are you?” part of being greeted to be silly, asking a question but not wanting an actual reply is just not very nice when you think about it.Here, Denmark, if someone asks the question it means they are interested and maybe even concerned about someones well being.

Someone at work would always ask, “How are you?” and I would answer, “Terrible.” She would always reflexively answer, “That’s good.”

So Goat didn’t really want to know how Rat was? Why bother asking?

The correct answer is “I’m coping.”

To people making the inquiry who are not friends or intimates, I usually answer the “How are you?” with a smile and reply “The usual manner, born of woman and destined to die.” I’m not sure which confuses them the most, the smile or the reply.

I’ve always preferred “¿Cómo te va?”( How’s it going?) or “¿Qué tal?” (What’s happening?) to the formal “¿Cómo está?” (How are you?) because you are likely to get a shorter reply.

How about SSDD?

SNAFU…

My new response.

If you can’t take the real answer, don’t ask the question.

FINE f***ed up, insecure, neurotic and egotistical. Thanks to my favorite author, Louise Penny, for that little jewel.

My usual is “I’m not getting better, I’m getting older…”

I often reply “Functional” or “Vertical”, or if I’m feeling talkative, “Functionally vertical”.

When people ask how you are, they don’t really want to know. And our answer is irrelevant and usually a lie, especially if we reply “Oh, I’m fine. And you?”. A lie followed by a false-interest query. This is what we call “being social”. Otherwise we’d say something truthful like, “Oh hey, glad to see you’re still alive today!” “Yeah I am. Thanks man!”

Or if we were answering truthfully, we’d wind up with, "My bowels are cramping and sinuses draining down my throat. Had a good breakfast but lunch was a bit of a loss and too expensive. I’m wondering whether Star Trek Piccard is going to be worth watching after the disaster of STD and at the same time feeling a bit stressed out about the direction Doctor Who has gone. And wow, I’ve suddenly got a huge itch in a place I can’t scratch right now….

“So… how are you? today?”

I appreciate honesty, Rat, but you’re not going to get anywhere by such brutally honest replies. Not that you care….

When I lived in TX if you asked, “How’re ya doin’?” the answer was usually, “Great!” I moved to PA and the answer is usually “Not bad”. I don’t know why it troubles me.

Doesn’t he mean “ruining” everything?

So same old, same old?

One leads to the other.

I too, fear death. Tax, a little more.