Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for November 15, 2022

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    BE THIS GUY  4 months ago

    Aren’t “when you don’t care quite that much” cards the blank ones in which you jot some platitude?

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    Heres Waldo  4 months ago

    “I don’t give a Rat’s… um…..”

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    Rhonda Santis  4 months ago

    Judging by the cards I’ve seen lately, Rat’s niche is already overfull.

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    willispate  4 months ago

    is that With or Without a Baseball Bat?

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    dadoctah  4 months ago

    “Oh! He’s our shortstop!”

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    B UTTONS  4 months ago

    Rat’s brand name: Hellmark

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    old_geek  4 months ago

    I guess one would give enough of a *# if they bought the card.

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    ronaldspence  4 months ago

    Hey a “Holemark” card Pig so you can tell people where to “stick it”

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    I'm here for the cookies Premium Member 4 months ago

    Can rat send me a catalog?

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    Uncle Kenny  4 months ago

    Melania Trump once wore a jacket that read, “I don’t really care. Do you?” She might buy one of Rat’s panel 4 cards.

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    Doug K  4 months ago

    If you don’t really care (one way or the other), you wouldn’t/shouldn’t bother to send any kind of a card.

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    iggyman  4 months ago

    Niche market Rat, what politicians might send to their opposing candidates!

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    andrew5  4 months ago

    I thought hallmark was the definition of “I don’t really care, but I’m doing this for the appearance”?

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    dlkrueger33  4 months ago

    That last niche will make him a millionaire.

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    Kayak_Brian  4 months ago

    Society has allowed too many rats to exist.

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    Jeremy Copeland  4 months ago

    I’m sold.

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    Algolei I  4 months ago

    I made a birthday card for my nephew once, it was the greatest birthday card ever. On the outside it said, “In honour of your birthday, I plan to set myself on fire and run screaming through the streets.”

    And on the inside it said, “…because I hate you.”

    He’s my favourite nephew, and it was a joke. Nobody else thought it was funny, which in my opinion makes it the greatest birthday card ever. :glee!:

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    wrd2255  4 months ago

    I once saw a humorous card someone made by hand, badly: “Money is tight, times are hard, here’s your fugging Christmas card.”

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    zerotvus  4 months ago

    I had Happy Pay Day cards. You could buy one a week or every two weeks. even had a jingle “Happy Pay Day, Happy Pay Day to You” So then they came up with direct deposit. And ruined me……….

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    cmerb  4 months ago

    I love the " RAT " : )

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    Stocky One  4 months ago
    Every day, in the other comics, there’s “nice” humour. And then there is Pearls Before Swine. I love it!
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    Ellis97  4 months ago

    Rat has never had the best of luck when it comes to greeting cards. They’re just to put people down.

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    Croc Holliday  4 months ago

    I think e-cards are how you say I care, but only in a very minimal way, not even enough to spend $1 for two cards at the dollar store.

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    Lee26 Premium Member 4 months ago

    People still send cards?? :) :)

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    ekw555  4 months ago

    are they less than $4.99 ?

    I’m in!

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    F-Flash  4 months ago

    How about used Cards, it’s recycling, John Kerry would be so proud of you, he would send you a used card to say thanks.

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    Goat from PBS  4 months ago

    I wonder what other lines he has. Maybe for the jealous person, “I deserved that promotion you $^! %()%# @%%*#(!”

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    Jeff0811  4 months ago

    What do you have in the way of “Get well whenever” cards?

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    oakie817  4 months ago

    remember it’s @ before # except after $

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    JudyAz  4 months ago

    Some years ago, I saw a card that read “Happy Mother’s Day, you mother!”

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    aerotica69  4 months ago

    I’ll take two dozen for X-mas, please.

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    MeGoNow Premium Member 4 months ago

    Isn’t that the whole point of greeting cards, that you don’t care enough to actually write a note?

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    Zebrastripes  4 months ago

    I couldn’t care less…but do you have a get well soon card for me to send to you?

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    wes tnt  4 months ago

    bought a hallmark card last week; “made in china” !!!

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    KEA  4 months ago

    He could sell red waistcoats as gifts… when you care enough to send the berry vest.

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    beezzll  4 months ago

    Wow! I think you just hit on something with possibilities ….

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    hariseldon59  4 months ago

    I remember a card with a hairy monster with the message – When you care enough to send the hairy beast.

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    dwkiser28603  4 months ago

    Hey Rat, trump called, he wants all you got to send to the gop…. FOR FREE NO LESS

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    curtlyon19  4 months ago

    ohohoh,,oh where can I get them?

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    Larry S  4 months ago

    I’d like to see chocolate fortune cookies called Tuf-Luk with funny but negative messages inside.

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    Banjo Gordy Premium Member 4 months ago

    During the time I worked at Hallmark 1960-1985 in the Contemporary Design Studio, Don Branham, one our best illustrators/writers had a card called ‘when you send the very beast’!

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    Greetings,little shut-in

    Do not pine or sigh

    If you’re not paroled by Christmas

    You’ll be out by the Fourth of July—-CURLEY HOWARD

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    Count Olaf Premium Member 4 months ago

    Rat also has those cards with places to enclose money but no money enclosed.

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    Ka`ōnōhi`ula`okahōkūmiomio`ehiku Premium Member 4 months ago

    I send all my recipients my finest electronic social media cards.

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    Liverlips McCracken Premium Member 4 months ago

    Years ago, probably for only a brief time, there was a line of greeting cards from a company called “Tactless Greetings.” Their tag line was “When you have to work up to caring.” I loved their cards – thought many were hilarious and bought a number of them. All gone now. I wrote to the company at the address listed for them on their merch and never got a reply.

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    raybarb44  4 months ago

    Then why bother at all……

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    cfkelley  4 months ago

    Anything not worth doing, is worth not doing well.

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    Buoy  4 months ago

    Should do well. The Scrooge and selfish market is pretty big.

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    willie_mctell  4 months ago

    In my dad’s last dime store the paint had faded on the wall above the greeting card racks. You could see the faint outline of the Ambassador Card line slogan, “Your personal envoy of good taste.” He went with American Greeting.

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    knight1192a  4 months ago

    I’ve seen both of Rat’s niches around here. Gotta say, they suck

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    DaBump Premium Member 4 months ago

    Rat forgot to mention they are MUCH, MUCH cheaper!

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    Michael McKown Premium Member 4 months ago

    I can relate. I had an idea. Hire an artist (on Fiverr) to create art that will fit on a 5×7 Christmas card: I told the artist Santa is at home, watching porn. He’s in a reclining chair, beer in one hand, remote in the other, watching some naked, hot girl on TV. Santa hat on his head, Santa jacket on, his Santa pants on the floor, he’s in his boxer shorts. He sent me a prelim sketch, I greenlit the final art and it’s amazing. Cost about $70. Then I sent the image to FineArtAmerica and had them print up the cards. Now I’m just waiting for Thanksgiving to be done before I send ‘em out. Next year, maybe I’ll have Santa BBQing Rudolph on a spit. :) I’d upload the art for you here, but no way to do that.

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    Otis Rufus Driftwood  4 months ago

    The people Rat is trying to sell greeting cards to don’t usually buy greeting cards in the first place. Not how entrepreneurs usually work.

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    Sisyphos  4 months ago

    I wish Rat had marketed his line of cards about 20 years earlier, when I might have used them!

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    Ron Bauerle  4 months ago

    I still like the commercial with a machine kerchunking away; camera zooms in to show it’s a card making machine, with each one reading “Just for you”… Wish I could find it on youtube…

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