Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for November 03, 2023

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    BE THIS GUY  8 months ago

    It’s not the 1990’s. No one under 60 talks on their cellphones.

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    ronaldspence  8 months ago


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    sirbadger  8 months ago

    Rat could say “I can’t taste anything. Will you taste the wine for me?” After ten customers, the waiter will start to get drunk.

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    BasilBruce  8 months ago

    He should have asked how much they charge for stuffing.

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    carlsonbob  8 months ago

    Where I live, people can’t go through a check out line in a store without their lousy phone in their face.

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    WCraft Premium Member 8 months ago

    Rat is from Ireland?

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    DanielRyanMulligan1  8 months ago

    If RAT is wrong about what corkage fees are, then just what in GOD’S name are they anyway?! Dan aka…

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    shanen0  8 months ago

    I had to look it up, but the definition said it was for the service of handling the bottle, which is obviously ridiculous. It’s a charge for not buying the wine from the restaurant.

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    Farside99  8 months ago

    Dang! There are times when I’d be tempted to pay that! Maybe get a group to pitch in so it was only $5 per person!

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    James Wolfenstein  8 months ago

    That’s why I never go to fancy shmancy restaurants. What the f***k is a corkage fee? Are they charging for the cork too???? What’s next? Table leg fee? “Do you want four legs or three legs?” Fortunately, the places where I go to eat have just one in the middle… and it wobbles… :D

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    Procat Premium Member 8 months ago

    I wonder if Rat drinks Champipple?

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    jel354  8 months ago

    The corkage fee does not cover “whine.”

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    Ichabod Ferguson  8 months ago

    Corkage fee, Ha! My wine has a screw top, so there.

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    einarbt  8 months ago

    With Rat on this one.

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    Croc Holliday  8 months ago

    Corkage fees, where you pay the restaurant for the wine you brought. Because I guess it’s really costly to wash those wine glasses.

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    DaBump Premium Member 8 months ago

    Heh, heh, heh.

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    Goat from PBS  8 months ago

    Is this a common occurrence? I cannot recall seeing this in a restaurant.

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    Gameguy49 Premium Member 8 months ago

    “A corkage fee is the cost restaurants charge to guests who bring their own bottle of wine to a restaurant, instead of ordering from the restaurant. Restaurants use corkage fees to allow guests to bring their own wine, while also charging them a small fee to do so.” – I’ll bring my own food too and say I was just there for the free ambiance.

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    Ellis97  8 months ago

    I don’t think that’s what a corkage is for, although I will admit that sitting next to a chatterbox is really annoying.

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    dolf37  8 months ago

    What the heck is a ‘corkage fee’? (Not the rat variety, but I assume there is something called that for real.)

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    Ignatz Premium Member 8 months ago

    And he’s probably talking finance, and thinks he’s impressing everyone in the restaurant.

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    uniquename  8 months ago

    The waiter should do that for free.

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    Count Olaf Premium Member 8 months ago

    The Count would suggest smacking Stevie Wonder up side the head with a bottle of Boones Farm, Vintage Tuesday.

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    HOTLOTUS1  8 months ago

    You all need to cut back on your meds. It’s ALL bad. AND old people are just as bad. the volume is sooo high . You’re out to dinner and NONE of you are that important(doctor maybe) that can’t sit there, WITH YOUR PHONE ON MUTE and just enjoy your meal and let everyone else do the same. text with ALL sound OFF!

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    Linguist  8 months ago

    Years ago, in Florida, I was dining in a very nice restaurant when some self-important little twit decided that everyone in the place should have to listen to his cell phone rant. Before I could complain to a waiter, a gentleman at another table got up, walked over to the loudmouth, and took his phone away, telling him politely that he could get it back when he was leaving.

    Not only did he leave the blabbermouth speechless, but he garnered a round of applause from the rest of the restaurant patrons and staff.

    The phone jerk wasn’t about to argue since the man who took his phone was about 6’ 6" tall and probably weighed close to 300 lbs.

    I won’t name names, but at the time, the large gentleman played football for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

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    Geezer  8 months ago


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    pheets  8 months ago

    Would be nice if they were :D

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    wildlandwaters  8 months ago

    …gonna need a bigger cork

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    Robert Wilson Premium Member 8 months ago

    There were also bottle clubs, which were lounges that did not have a liquor license, but were allowed to serve you your own liquor, if you brought it in from elsewhere.

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    drtodd12  8 months ago

    Where’s the menu?

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    jtrevor99  8 months ago

    There are plenty who watch videos or sports games at max speaker volume though.

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    [Unnamed Reader - 14b4ce]  8 months ago

    Some waiters just don’t know their duty when they see it.

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    Silence Dogood Premium Member 8 months ago

    Best take I heard is that people who constantly yak on their phones really aren’t talking to anybody, they’re just trying to make people think they have friends…

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    zeexenon  8 months ago

    Pricey, but, like me, it takes time to filter out all the darned pieces.

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    BeniHanna6 Premium Member 8 months ago

    Would have thought Rat would have put his own cork in that A hole.

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    old_geek  8 months ago

    Should they charge a “corkage” fee if one brings wine in a box?

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    Buoy  8 months ago

    Some people sure know how to talk. I was on a cross country flight the other day, and the two guys behind me started talking as soon as they sat down, and never let up the whole flight and continued to talk while off boarding.

    Silence is sadly underrated.

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    stamps  8 months ago

    If their corkage fee is $30, I’d hate to think what a bottle of wine costs.

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    Curiosity Premium Member 8 months ago

    But it Should Be!!!

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    willie_mctell  8 months ago

    Put in your earplugs. Pull on your eyeshades. You know where to put the cork.

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    Jwhitcomb1966  8 months ago

    Just because you CAN take a phone call anywhere, and at any time, doesn’t mean you should.

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    Otis Rufus Driftwood  8 months ago

    Would be great if that were a thing.

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    PAR85  8 months ago

    I have to say that I’m with Rat on this one.

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    Jaime Jean M  8 months ago

    Thanks for letting me know there’s an English word for “descorche”. One of the most abusive practices in restaurantes South of the Rio Grande.

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    Sisyphos  8 months ago

    I know, Rat! Isn’t it confusing? Never heard of “corkage” in my sheltered life until I got to college….

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    hitman4cookies  8 months ago

    I gotta say I sympathize with Rat for a change.

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