Ripley's Believe It or Not by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! for September 10, 2021

  1. Coyote
    eromlig  almost 3 years ago

    Most shaggy dog stories don’t have dogs in them, but tonight’s actually does:

    It seems there’s this talented flea who got himself an agent so he could become famous and make a fortune. The agent calls him one day and says, “I got you a great gig – you’ll be on Benji’s back!” This sounds like a great opportunity for a flea, so he jumps (sorry) at the chance.

    The next morning, the agent’s phone rings; it’s the flea. “You gotta get me out of here,” the flea says. “Benji scratches; his handlers comb him and spray him with anti-flea stuff – I almost got killed!”

    “OK, OK,” the agent says. “But a new opening just came up in Willie Nelson’s beard. Do you want it?” Well, this sounds pretty good to the flea, and the next day he found himself in Shotgun Willie’s whiskers.

    However, the next morning the agent’s phone rings again. Yup, it’s the flea. “You gotta get me out of here,” says the flea. “This gig looked so good, but Willie chews tobacco, he smokes cigars and pot; his breath is horrible, and his beard is a hell-hole. Help!”

    The agent sighs. “Well, it just so happens you’re a VERY lucky flea, ‘cause I have ONE MORE SPOT for you, and this one you’ll love – it’s in Dolly Parton’s privates. What could you POSSIBLY not like about THAT??”

    The flea, of course, jumps (again) at the chance, and the agent figures he’ll never hear from the flea again, at least not until Dolly retires. However…yup, the next morning the phone rings. “What in the WORLD is wrong now?!” the agent screams. Don’t tell me there’s something wrong with Dolly Parton’s privates!”

    “Oh, there’s no problem with Dolly Parton’s privates,” the flea explains. “But you see, there was a big country music festival over the weekend, and, well, to make a long story short, I’m back in Willie Nelson’s beard.”

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  2. 16914740417144785387296898810443
    jasonsnakelover  almost 3 years ago

    Whobert Rite

    One time I was standing 196 feet 11 inches tall.

    May the Lord be with you.

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  3. B986e866 14d0 4607 bdb4 5d76d7b56ddb
    Templo S.U.D.  almost 3 years ago

    the UAE must be quite the place… even if Garfield continuously tries to mail Nermal there

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  4. Saw whet in hand
    khmo  almost 3 years ago

    That new observation balloon will be the source of many UFO reports/

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  5. Huckandfish
    Huckleberry Hiroshima  almost 3 years ago

    And Virginia Quail loved him from afar.

    Take care, may famed ornithologist Gloria “Tweety” Yankford be with you, and gesundheit.

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    sdjamieson Premium Member almost 3 years ago

    Why was he in such a hurry? Did he remember he left the stove on?

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  7. Missing large
    petermerck  almost 3 years ago

    Pool took forever to fill with the garden hose.

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  8. Missing large
    Elmopzumwalt  almost 3 years ago

    So who was William J. Knight? An imposter?

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  9. Great view up here
    comixbomix  almost 3 years ago

    Good to see Dubai getting geared up for life underwater after the oceans rise…

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  10. Rosie the rivetor
    Camiyami Premium Member almost 3 years ago

    Wow, a whole 10 inches deep! :D

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    Mr Funny Man  almost 3 years ago

    Here is one for all you Texans!How can a black man change a republican politician’s views on abortion?Get his wife pregnant.

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    dwdl21  almost 3 years ago

    X-15 was one bad ass piece of machinery.

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  13. Missing large
    billwog  almost 3 years ago

    Silver Out! that’s the best part.

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  14. Greg backlit
    mindjob  almost 3 years ago

    I’d like to know what kind of aircraft was used to fly faster than mach 6

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  15. Bluedog
    Bilan  almost 3 years ago

    Due to the recent financial crisis in Dubai, the houses in the pool are now underwater.

    (seriously, nobody brought that up yet?)

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  16. Yellow submarine
    spaced man spliff  almost 3 years ago

    At that depth the pressure would become a significant factor.

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  17. Get smart shoe phone
    gopher gofer  almost 3 years ago

    the telescope might be impressive if it were an improvement over hubble rather than the same…

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  18. Missing large
    ekke  almost 3 years ago

    I’ve often been a critic of GoComics technical savvy, and of RBION. So, in all good conscience I have to thank GoComics now for improving the presentation of RBION so that the new font is clearly legible. All it took was a larger size! Good job.

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    pbr50138  almost 3 years ago

    I wonder what plane or space ship he was in, that could go that fast?

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