Ripley's Believe It or Not by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! for June 22, 2022

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    stevesilver48  5 months ago

    Hey now Ripley’s Believe It Or Not! Comic fans! How’s it going tonight? Has anyone told a contractor joke yet? Maybe this’ll be a first. Here we go.A contractor – nowadays that could be anyone with a pick up truck – arrived at the Pearly Gates. There were many people ahead of him lined up according to age but when St. Peter saw this contractor he left his desk at the gate and came down the long line and greeted him warmly. Then he and one of his assistants guided the contractor to the front of the line into a nice comfortable chair right by St. Peter’s desk. They brought him a lovely charcuterie platter and a Mint Julep that looked to die for pun intended. The contractor said, “I love all this attention but, not for nothing, what makes me so special?” St. Peter said, “When we heard you were coming we added up all the hours for which you billed your clients over the years and by our calculation you must be 193 years old!”BA DUMP BUMP! and that’s a wrap. Silver, out!

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    JDP_Huntington Beach  5 months ago

    Another MacDonalds note? Somebody is pulling out the Bathroom reader ed 1

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    jasonsnakelover  5 months ago

    Telliott Anner One time I was 14 years old.

    One time I was 64 years old.

    One time there were 85,001 earthquakes.

    May the Lord be with you.

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    Храм С.О.Д. (Templo S.U.D. ucraniano)  5 months ago

    how did McDonald’s grub from half a century and thirteen extra years manage to get into a wall without much decomposition?

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    stevesilver48  5 months ago

    And child prodigy week continues here on RBION Comic! Is it just me or could Elliott Tanner be a guy OR a gal with that name and that look. Could Zee artiste, Mr. Castazo, be messing with us a little? Hmmm?

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    bookworm0812  5 months ago

    Um….eew? How did those six-plus decade fries not stink up the place?

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    oakie817  5 months ago

    so, they ate the 63 year old french fries?

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    Huckleberry Hiroshima  5 months ago

    That’s called trash, Mrs. Jones.

    Take care, may steeped in ennui self-descibed philosopher Theodore “Write A Mundane Notion In A Cryptic Manner And They’ll Call You A Poet Say It Twice And They’ll Call You A Prophet” Bordord be with you, and gesundheit.

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    JoshHere  5 months ago

    Miss Tanner looks much older than 13. The smarter you are, the older you look

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    Tuco  5 months ago

    ROUGH RIDERBoudreaux decided to try his hand at horseback riding, although he had no prior experience or training. He mounted the horse and steadied himself in the saddle. As the horse reached a full gallop, Boudreaux slipped from the saddle. He grabbed for the mane but was unsuccessful. He tried to throw his arms around the horse’s neck, but that failed, too. In a last ditch effort to save himself, he frantically jumped from the horse in an attempt to hurl himself to safety, but unfortunately, his foot got caught in the stirrup. He was now at the mercy of the horse’s pounding hooves. His head struck the ground again and again, mere moments away from unconsciousness, when…… the Wal-Mart greeter ran out to turn the horse off!

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    198.23.5.11  5 months ago

    Probably authentic.Look at the bag.The “hamburger head Mascot” is extinct now,but was popular in t he old days beforeRonald McDonald stole the show.

    I preferred “Wetson’s”

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    heathcliff2  5 months ago

    Yes, seems more forgotten volcanoes are requesting attention.

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    paranormal  5 months ago

    There weren’t hamburgers in the wrappers???

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    ekke  5 months ago

    I remember when a co-worker discovered a 15-year-old package of Twinkies in an old desk drawer. Just as fresh, moist and appealing as the day they were injection molded! (No, nobody ate them.)

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    Charlie Fogwhistle  5 months ago

    An incredibly wealthy genius loves riddles.

    Bored with being smarter than anyone he meets, the man decides to offer his fortune to anyone who is able to stump him with a question or riddle. Thousands of people come to try and trick the man, but without effort he answers every riddle and piece of trivia he is challenged with.

    Finally an old Lady walks in followed by 7 voluptuous naked women. The old lady instructs the women to stand in a line, and then arranges them so that the first woman is turned away and bent over at the waist, the second leaning towards the genius arching her back with her chest pushed out, the third again facing away and bent over, the fourth facing the man with her breasts nearly in the mans face, the last three women are then turned around and bent over exposing their rears to the man.

    Once in position the old lady looks to the genius, and tells him, ‘this was my late husbands favorite song. What is it?’

    The genius unable to concentrate on anything other than the 7 beautiful naked women in front of him finally concedes that he doesn’t know the answer, and transfers over to the woman his vast fortune and asks her the answer.

    She smiles and tells him, ‘Obviously it’s the William Tell Overture’, She gestures to the naked women next to her, and sings as she points to them one by one ‘Bum Titty Bum Titty Bum Bum Bum’.

    Until next time.

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    stevesilver48  5 months ago

    Clever but vaguely unsettling.

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    spaced man spliff Premium Member 5 months ago

    Gimme Bob’s Big Boy every time.

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    A# 466  5 months ago

    Somebody has to say it: There’s a whole lotta shakin’ goin’ on!

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    MetalOverCountry  5 months ago

    The Tanner part is snobby, and I disapprove because it makes people “less educated” feel inferior. Just a show-off. Besides, academic smarts are overrated, and you can cheat your way through pretty easy.

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