Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for October 28, 2000
Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling Bush n' Cheney's Guide To Getting Rich! George W. Bush: YOU can create wealth for fun and profit! Dick Cheney: And despite what certain liberal politicians say, it has nothing to do with GOVERNMENT! Just use our E-Z to follow instructions First, use family political connections to assemble a group that can buy a baseball team and will include you. Man: Mr. President! Man #2: Can W. come out and play? Then convince the city government to build you a stadium...and then give it and the surrounding land to you. George W. Bush: This might be a profitable deal. WHAT?! You've got no family political connections?! Ha-ha! Don't panic! We've got a backup plan for the less fortunate. Simply parlay your cabinet post into a job as CEO of an oil services corporation that relies on government contracts. Man: Secretary...I mean MR. Cheney, we'd like you to be our CEO. Dick Cheney: I'm flattered! Then use your Pentagon and government connections to land hugely profitable government contracts and loan guarantee giveaways--and watch your stock skyrocket! General: I sign here, Dick? Dick Cheney: Ah, I can feel the wealth being created! Simple ain't it? No need to thank us. And definitely don't thank the government. George W. Bush: We're just a coupla points of light doin' what we can. Dick Cheney: Big time! Remember: The government can't create prosperity. And if elected, we'll prove it!
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