Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for February 14, 2009
Tom the Dancing Bug's Super-Fun-Pak Comix Edited by Ruben Bolling Joe LaBum Man: Joe, your jokey name seems French. Joe: Yes. Man: Yet you're shirtless and you wear a poorly conceived Indian turban. Joe: Yes... Joe: I'm a comic strip character created by a 10-year-old. The Epic/ Epic Report Man: Dude, last night I got so hammered! Man #2: EPIC! Man: I blew chunks on my girlfriend! Man #2: EPIC!! Man: And I drove my car onto a crowded sidewalk. Man #2: EPIC! Cowboys vs. Dinosaurs Man: It's cowboys vs. dinosaurs! Man #2: WHERE?! Man: Aw, I was just kidding. Man: So. Um...are you carrying? Happy Ending Comix Man: The sub's out of power, and we're running out of air! Woman: How can this possibly have a "happy ending"? NEXT: Happy Ending! Bob Bob's Secrets #811 You'd never know, because he sucks it in whenever he thinks anyone's looking, but bob has a bit of a belly! A Note To Our Readers Since you are reading this, a comic strip, you are without doubt an enthusiast of antiquated, obsolete art-forms. We congratulate you for eschewing the economically viable entertainments of the day, such as the TeleVisions, the Eye-Phones, and the You Tubes, and for seeking nostalgic solace in the quaint diversions of a bygone era. MAY WE RECOMMEND that you enjoy this vestigial divertissement while listening to your Victrola, playing a waxy disc reproducing the soothing tones of a man singing through a megaphone. THIS OLDE-TYME AMUSEMENT will look best when viewed by the light of a gas-pressure railroad lantern. In the flickering light, it may even appear as though the comical figures are animate, if you squint. IF YOU ENJOY the extinct and nearly extinct, you might peruse this comical entertainment with a pet ammonite on your lap. Leave to the less discerning the passing fads of moving images and vertebrate companionship.
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